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About Toronto

Last summer, I dragged my sorry butt up there—total shitshow. Slipped on scree, twisted my ankle, yelled “I’m too old for this crap!” at a marmot. Made me so mad I could’ve chucked my trekking pole into the abyss. But then—bam!—summit views hit me like a truck. Snowy peaks, wildflowers, air so crisp it’s like snorting freedom. I was happy as a pig in mud, giggling like an idiot. “Nothing’s hidden anymore,” I said, quoting Haneke, ‘cept I was probs just delirious from altitude.

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Oh man, Uxbridge, CA is a trip, lemme tell ya. So, I'm runnin’ my massage lounge here, and every day, I see the raw side of life. Uxbridge is all twisty streets like Main St. and 2nd Ave., nailing you with that weird blend of rustic charm and modern chaos. You got your fancy cul-de-sac vibes in the north, real hidden gems where locals whisper about secret parties, and my favorite — the old mill on Riverside Dr. – yup, that’s the spot where the river squeaks its timeless tune reminding me of "The New World" vibes: “The earth was made to be a mystery.” Yeah, poetic crap that hits when you least expect it.

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