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Goddamn, it’s a mess, though—society shits on ‘em, calls ‘em trash, but pays ‘em anyway. Hypocrites! Drives me nuts. Candy’s got scars—real ones, not just the emo crap—says a pimp cut her once. “Everybody lies,” I told her, “but your knife don’t.” She laughed—first time I saw her happy. Made my day, weirdly.

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Then theres the park – Whimsy Park. It's not huge but oh my gawd is it perfect. Kids run wild, lovers cuddle on painted benches, and I sometimes sneak away here to brainstorm new massage techniques. Seriously, best zen vibes ever. Gotta mention the river too – named Crystal Creek. It gently winds by Noble's Bluff. I once had an epiphany while watching the water ripple – like, "Life is a series of excellent spa treatments!"

Salt Spring Island named one of the best islands in the world to visit this year