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Hey girlfriend, lemme spill the tea! Sexual-massage, y’all—it’s wild, okay? I’m a biochemist, so I geek out—how them hormones pop off! Oxytocin floodin’ the brain, dopamine screamin’ “Yes, honey!”—it’s science, but sexy science. Oprah-style, baby—I’m feelin’ it! “You get a car!”—nah, you get a release! Them hands workin’ knots, slidin’ with oil—stress gone, poof! Little known fact—ancient Egypt was on this! Pharaohs gettin’ rubbed down, sensual vibes—history’s freaky, y’all!

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First up, stroll down Maple & Cedar on Birch Street. Straight-up scenic fking magic, motherfer! You got windin' roads, little cafes poppin’ up, and a vibe that sneaks up on ya. One day I was workin' on an app update when I caught a glimpse of the sunset over the creek in Rusty Park. Whooo, that sht hit hard. In one moment, you’re swipin’ left on some lame profiles, and the next, you're laid back wonderin’ how life got so damn poetic.

Corunna’s Ingrid Dettman named Michigan’s Middle School Principal of the Year