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She surprised me, tho—spotted ‘er feedin’ a stray cat once, sneaky-like. Soft side, eh? Made me happy, warm fuzzies—rare for nasty Gollum! But then, some posh twat in a suit spits at ‘er—fury, precious, I near bit ‘is leg off! “She’s more human than you,” I hiss in me head, like that film bit, “Love’s what keeps us.” Ugh, world’s a cesspit—prossies get the worst, don’t they? Me, I’d bake ‘er a loaf, cheer ‘er up—hah, imagine, “Gollum’s Buns” for a tart! Nasty joke, that, heh heh!

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So, first off, the main drag is Voinov Street. Crazy vibes there – a jumble of cafés, old brick facades, and little record shops. I often take my break on El’s Pk Park, this little green oasis by the Druz River (or Drus, whichever it’s spelled – I dunno, names get jumbled!). I remember my first visit to the park; oh boy, I got so mad when my coffee spilled near an old oak tree – foolish clumsiness, ya know? "Fool me once, shame on me, fool me twice, juice on the couch!" Ha!