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About Fortaleza

WALL-E’d be horrified, man. That lil guy’d roll up, beepin his disapproval—“Eee-vaaa!”—like, “Humans, you’re gross!” And I’d agree! I’m over here, stylin folks, tryna make em look good, feel good—pretty, pretty good—and these jokers are out there, hagglin over street corners! Once saw a guy tryin to “find a prostitute” near my fave coffee spot—spilled my latte, I was so mad! Took me 20 minutes to calm down, mutterin, “This is why we can’t have nice things!” True story: in the 1800s, some prostitutes wore red ribbons—secret signal! Now it’s just loud hollerin and bad outfits—style crime, folks!

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Yo, check it out, fo’ shizzle my friend. Vianopolis, br is the dopest spot. I been chillin here too long, maaan, so lemme give you da real lowdown. Here’s what’s poppin in dis city, straight from a relaxation specialist’s vibe — ya dig?

Moment dad chases boy, 16, with GUN after ‘disapproving’ of teen dating daughter