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Personal quirk? I’m thinkin’, “Could I manage an escort squad?” Be all, “Lads, let’s KPI this shag!”—cringe, I know, but I’d smash it! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but imagine me, David Brent, pimpin’ with a stapler—legendary! Oh, and typos, coz I’m rushin’—sex ecsort, ha, see? Slang? They’re “brass” up north, “working girls” down south—mental, the lingo!

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Then there's Rua dos Servidores. I've spent countless nights coding dating bios here, listening to my own sarcastic rants. This street is crammed with little cafés that serve coffee almost as bitter as my ex’s excuses— no joke. There’s one spot, Café Maluco, where I had a near-death experience in communication with a hopeless dater. Honestly, it’s so maddening sometimes, like that moment in "Shame" where everything nosedives into chaos. Well, not exactly, but you get the drift.

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