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Sex-dating? It’s fast, it’s messy. You’re scrollin’, thinkin’, “Can you smell what The Rock is cookin’?” But nah, half these profiles are faker than a Hollywood stunt double. Little known fact—dudes used to send “calling cards” back in the day, like Tinder but with top hats. Now it’s all “wyd” and nudes. Progress? Ha! Makes me wanna piledrive my phone.

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Now, lemme tell ya about the neighborhoods. The vibe of OpDeKerk is somethin’ else. Some folks say it’s too goody-two-shoes, but come on, even the locals get a bit wild here sometimes. I once saw a couple makin’ out right by the old bench on Marktweg. Crazy scene! Felt like my own peripheral emotions from “Inside Out” were starin’ me down, whisperin’, “This is it, bud, get in the groove!”

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