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Alright, mate, strap in—here’s me, David Brent, y’know, Dental Technician extraordinaire, spillin’ the beans on findin’ a prossie! Right, so I’m sittin’ there, polishin’ dentures, thinkin’, “Life’s a bit like *Boyhood*, innit? Takes ages to get good!” Then bam—idea hits me: why not find a prostitute? Not for me, obviously—team buildin’ exercise, yeah? Boost morale! Corporate synergy, that’s the Brent way.

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Ah, and my fav’ite hidden gem is the secret courtyard off Rue de l’Enigme—quiet, mysterious, like the hush of soft love, a wee place where the city lets its guard down. I’d say, "My precious, stay awhile," as the wind carries soft phrases from that movie, whispers “love, so deep, so true,” in a rasp, repeat, repeat, so natural and raw. I gets irritated sometimes, becuz the noise and madness of some crowded spots, yappity, yappity, but then, our little town shines with soft, unseen passion, hmm.

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