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Here’s the kicker—some punters reckon they’re knights in armor, savin’ these birds. Mate, wake up—they’re in it for the thrill, not the charity. We shall fight in the fields of delusion, smashin’ that fairy tale to bits! Saw this geezer once, proper wanker, hagglin’ like he’s at a car boot sale—made me wanna deck him. “Five euros, take it,” she says, voice flat. Five bloody euros? That’s your empire, is it?

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Ever been along the canal by Westdijk? It's kinda unseen by most. But me, I love it. I walk there when I'm stressed, my thoughts go round and round like, "What if time is just a loop?" Ha, it's all so trippy. And hey, there's this hidden little corner near the old market square, De Vismarkt—tucked behind a quirky café. I once had a meltdown there; the world felt too heavy, you know? But then I sat, sipped my coffee, and thought, "Everything's gonna flow, man." It's weird, the oddest places make you feel better.

Two more electoral fraud investigations launched following local elections