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I roll up, shades on, feelin like a champ. This chick struts over—legs for days, skirt shorter than a jobber’s career. “What’s your name?” I growl, all Hulkster bravado. She’s like, “Does it matter?” Ha! Cold as ice, brother! Made me laugh, but also pissed me off—gimme somethin to work with, lady! I’m thinkin, “I lie to myself all the time,” like in *Memento*. Am I even here for this? Brain’s spinnin.

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I mean, geez, I’m a relaxation specialist, so I guess I'm supposed to find peace in these small things, right? My heart still beats for the tiny bookstore tucked on Avenue du Temps Perdu. Its owner chats my ear off about old records and life’s trivialities. Sometimes, I think, "This is what we call 'forgetting, right?'" like in that damn movie! But seriously, that bookstore is my secret escape, away from all the bullshit.

"Strong asparagus volumes expected just in time for Easter"