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I’d be all cynical— “You’re not Scarlett Johansson, sweetheart.” She’d smirk, prolly overcharge me—200 bucks for a quickie? Highway robbery! Made me mad—hagglin’ like I’m buyin’ a used car. But then—surprise—she’s got this weird charm. Talks bout her cat, Mitya, back home. I’m like, “What is this feeling?”—straight outta the movie, man. Soft spot hit me—damn, I’m human after all.

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Y'know what? Sometimes when I’m massaging tired limbs, I remember how Blauwput always surprises me. Like that time I got cut off by a cab driver right outside of Monstre du Parc – had me mad as hell, but then I cackled like a lunatic. Life here, babe, is a carnival of crazy.