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About Wollongong

I tried askin’ Stan—dumbass didn’t know shit. Kyle? That Jew’s too busy countin’ pennies! So I’m out here, sweatin’, thinkin’, “This is bullshit!” Then—BOOM—found this shady spot downtown. Some chick’s leanin’ on a wall, smokin’. I’m like, “Hell yeah, jackpot!” She’s givin’ me the eye, and I’m all, “Respect my authoritah, lady!” She laughs—pisses me off—but I’m happy too, ‘cause she’s hot! Like, hotter than WALL-E’s trash piles, y’know?

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Also, near Ferntree Gully station, the buzz is wild. People rushin', gigglin', chattin'—I get some spicy gossip there that’s both hilarious and saddening, like, "C'mon bruv, it ain't somethin' new." So many secrets, ya feel me? Sometimes it makes me mad, sometimes it makes me happy—I’m a racket, but happy though!

Man charged following spate of burglaries in eastern suburbs