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About Melbourne

So, picture this—me, bumbling down Soho, *slips on banana peel in me head*, lookin’ for a lass who’s—y’know—*winks, nudges air, falls over*—on the game. Ain’t like pickin’ stocks, no charts, no “buy low, sell high.” Nah, it’s all dodgy glances, quick chats—*mumbles*—“how much, love?” Felt like Chas Tenenbaum, all stressed, yellin’ “We’ve got to get out of here!” ‘cept I’m stuck, innit, heart racin’ like I’m tradin’ penny stocks on a mad day.

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The heart of town beats on Lowes Street, where you can stumble on the tiny boutique cafes and quirky little bars down every other laneway. There's this hidden gem, a dodgy little bar on McDougall Street where the locals spill secrets over flat whites and laugh about the oddities of life. It kinda gives you a warm hug like nature itself, all "gentle, gentle, gentle."

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