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Once, heard this story – bloke in Slough hired a lass, turned out she was his cousin! Absolute stitch-up, that. “The faun will guide us!” – nah, mate, the faun’s takin’ the piss. Made me cringe so hard I hid under me desk. Personal quirk? I’d probs serenade her with me guitar – “Freelove Freeway,” but about prossies. Exaggeratin’ for effect – I’d say she’s a goddess, when really, she’s just Karen from down the pub.

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Yo, my friend, come hurr yer way to Warradale (au)! Hmm, hmm… let me tell ya, this place is somethin’ else. I'm a sexologist here, right? And ya know, I see all kinds of passion n’ hidden emotions that even the stars whisper about. Yoda style, I gotta say, “Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate…” But passion, oh yes, passion it also leads to love.

Sex offender found dead in home