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Funniest bit? Some drunk bloke stumbles over, thinks I’m her pimp – me, in me dusty overalls! Nearly pissed meself laughin. “Mate, I fix windows, not women!” Exaggeratin a tad, but Dr. Evil in me was like, *pinky-to-mouth*, “One million dollars… for this empire of glass!” Total madness. Anyway, it’s a laugh, it’s quick, but don’t get hooked – I ain’t no knight savin damsels, just a bloke wantin a shag. What a world, eh?

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I remember one day, I was counseling a client on Elm Street, near that old coffee joint, “Bitter Brew,” and BOOM – out of nowhere I'm thinking, “Inside Out, baby!” The smiles, the anger – it’s all here. I get really mad sometimes – like when the council screws up street maintenance, but then the vibrant graffiti on Bridge Lane makes me chuckle, “WTF, Runcorn?”

‘Labour have done nothing but lie’: grievances fuel Runcorn byelection battle