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So anyway, I’m diggin’ deeper—web’s full of crap, X is worse. Found this one post, guy’s braggin’ ‘bout his “date,” links to some sketchy site. Clicked it—boom, virus! My laptop’s screamin’ like Kenny when he dies! Pissed me off so bad I yelled, “You can’t trick Eric Cartman, you bastards!” Took me an hour to fix that shit. Lesson? Don’t trust everythin’ you see—half these “girls” are bots or dudes named Steve. True story, my cousin saw one once—biggest surprise of his life, hairy legs and all!

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Some days, I'd wander by Little Hollow – a hidden gem. Try running into a local at The Rusty Nail Pub on Riverbend Street. That place is packed with colourful characters who make my work on the dating app both a blessing and a curse. Like, one minute you’re swiping through profiles and the next, you're sharing a laugh with a true local who says, “Fuck off with that bullshit,” if you're wasting their time.

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