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So, we haggles—me hissin’, her laughin’. “Ten quid,” she says. I’m like, *you wanna play a game?*—cos I ain’t got ten! Gave her five, an’ she’s all, “Fine, ya cheap git.” We goes round a corner—dark, like Gotham’s underbelly. She’s quick, no muckin’ about—prossies don’t waste time, see? Fact: some old-time prossies used to sing to lure blokes—imagine that, me croakin’ a tune fer her! Hah! *Let’s put a smile on that face*—she didn’t laugh, tho, stony as Batman.

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Heyyy, buddy!! So, lemme tell ya 'bout Ferntree-Gully—it’s wicked, like, totally off the hook! Ruh-roh! I'm a sexologist here and, like, my work kinda shows ya the real vibes of the streets. So, check it: there's Church Street, ya know, right in the thick of things. It’s busy, full of cool cafés, tiny boutiques… and like, secret nooks perfect for steamy chat sesh stories!

Death of Ferntree Gully man uncovered.