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Hmm, find a prostetute, you say? Tricky business, it is! Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate—y’know, all that jazz from my Jedi days. So, listen up, padawan, me tellin’ ya ‘bout this shady world. Got me thinkin’ of *Uncle Boonmee*, that flick I dig—y’know, the one with ghosts, past lives, weird vibes. “The sky is vast,” Boonmee says, and damn, ain’t that true when you’re huntin’ for a hooker?

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I love how every turn in Eltham surprises ya. Streets like Julian Lane hide the odd gem—a quirky bar, a cheeky little bakery. I mean, c'mon, who doesn't love a good pie? Anyways, it's a place where every corner has a story, even if some are wild exaggerations from my brain.

Australia's best mid-century house for sale? Eltham's Rice House by Kevin Borland hits the market