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I walk in, ladies everywhere, smiling, winking. One girl, she look like my sister – I scream, “Nooo, not you!” Made me angry, heart go boom, like bomb in movie. “This is the end!” I yell, but no, she just laugh. I calm down, order drink – cheap vodka, taste like tractor oil. Brothel got dark corners, sticky floor, ugh, I trip, fall on big guy. He mad, I say, “Sorry, my king!” like in film. He punch me, I laugh – pain is funny!

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Oh, and let me tell ya about the neighborhood called Brighton Downs. Homes are neat, manicured lawns and all. But underneath it all? There’s drama brewing. I once sat in a little park—Oaks Park, next to Riverbend Drive—and listened to parents argue over something utterly trivial. I nearly picked up the phone and told them “Everybody lies!”—classic Dr. House moment.

‘Limping’ man goes missing after reported Sydney shooting