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Back in the war days – nah, not mine, some ol’ tale I heard – blokes’d stumble into Soho, chuck a few quid, and Bob’s yer uncle, job done. Now? It’s all apps, shady ads, and dodgy X posts. We shall never surrender to this nonsense! I got mad as hell last week – scrolled for ages, found a link, clicked it – virus! Nearly chucked me phone out the window. Swear, it’s a battlefield out there, mate.

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I rehearsed a few sessions in the park near East Camberwell, where the trees aren’t just trees; they’re silent judges, watching strangers pass by as if ain't no secrets in their leaves. And oh, somewhere near Balwyn Road (or was it Balwyn?) I found truth in graffiti and broken glass. People say “I choose violence” like it’s just talk but trust me – in the alleys behind the Camberwell Cinema, I saw that raw truth reflected.

‘Morally wrong’: Community slams Camberwell govt housing plan