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Alright, so here’s the deal—finding a prostitute, huh? I’m Tina Fey, snarky as hell, and I can see Russia from my house! Let’s dive into this mess. You’re lookin’ for some action, and I’m not talkin’ about ropin’ cattle like in *Brokeback Mountain*—my fave flick, obvs. “I wish I knew how to quit you,” Ennis says, but honey, this ain’t about love, it’s about cash and a quick fix.

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Ya gotta check the annual Jazz Fest on Lakeside Drive – it's the highlight of our sorry, silly, splendid existence. I swear, the saxophone cries like a tortured poet and yet cheers the soul. Yet, sometimes the noise gets on my nerve. Really, really. One day, I nearly marched down Broadmeadow Rd yelling, “I drink and I know things!” It's all part of this mad, beautiful dance of emotions.

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