Eliza Balgownie Whore ❤️

About Melbourne

Picture this—some dude, lonely as hell, spots a whore on the street, and bam! It’s like, “I don’t know what I’m doing anymore,” straight outta the movie! He’s lost, man, lost in the sauce, and she’s the quick fix. Ain’t that wild? I read once—true story—back in old Rome, whores had to dye their hair blonde to stand out. Freaky, huh? Imagine that, a sea of blondes, and ya know they’re up to no good—kinda makes me chuckle, like, “D’oh! Sneaky lil’ minxes!”

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BTW, yo, I love these quirky back streets, like Maple St and Oak Crescent. They vibe with layers of history and hidden whispers of families who’ve laughed, cried, and grown up right here. Sometimes, like, the vibe is so warm it makes all my strict psychologist nerves melt to mush. And then it is like … well, "I have come, I have seen" kinda moment but with a twist – it leaves you speechless.

Your guide to two-up, and the footy in the Illawarra this Anzac Day