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About Vienna

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, dental tech extraordinaire, and I hate everything. So, findin’ a prostitute? Pfft, what a mess. Been grindin’ teeth molds all day, then bam—some buddy says, “Ron, let’s find a prozzie.” I’m like, “Divorce is imminent,” straight outta *A Serious Man*. Life’s already a damn circus, now this?

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I love wanderin’ through Herrengasse. Ugh, man, so many winding corners, tiny cafes, and secrets tucked away. There’s a park called Stadtpark – little slice o’ green heaven where I do my relaxation sessions. Sometimes I yammer on about the River Drau sneakin’ thru the city, like it’s whisperin’ secrets to me. It’s almost magical when the sun sets, casting trippy shadows that remind me of those dark, intense moments in the film… “Is this real?” – goddamn, I get shivers!