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About Villach

So, I’m back at it—breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President”—scrollin’ the web, dodgin’ creeps. Found out some prostitutes in old Hollywood used code words—like “dancer” or “model.” Sneaky, huh? Kept the cops off their tails. I’m imaginin’ me, sashayin’ in, whisperin’, “You need a dancer, cowboy?” Gigglin’ to myself—god, I’m a riot! But real talk—findin’ one’s tricky. Gotta watch for scams—some jerk tried chargin’ me 50 bucks just to “talk.” Screw that noise!

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Now listen up – not everything here is all sunshine, ya know? Like, sometimes the noise gets on my nerves, makes me mad. But that's life, right? Just like in the movies, sometimes you got to take the good with the bad. I even had a fight with a stubborn door on Blumenweg once – too many typos in my mind, haha, so sorry if that makes no sense!

FEMAIL takes a look at the Austrian team the Lionesses prepare to face off tonight