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About Innsbruck

Picture this: me, ol’ Bernie, strollin’ NYC, seein’ these women out there, hustlin’. Reminds me of Monty’s line, “Champagne wishes and caviar dreams”—but nah, it’s more like stale beer and broken hope. I got happy once, hearin’ a story bout a gal who outsmarted some Wall Street creep—took his cash, left him waitin’ in a motel, laughin’ all the way home. Good for her, I say! Stick it to the 1%!

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And the river? The small but snazzily named Bayerische Bächlein winds through the outskirts. Perfect spot for a midnight rant or heart-to-heart with your date – sometimes even makes me think, “I don't want to survive. I want to live.” Crazy, right? That line always hits me every damn time.