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So check this—findin’ a prostitute ain’t no cakewalk, ya dumbasses. I’m scrollin’ X, tryna peep profiles, see who’s out there slingin’ ass. Some chick posts, “50 bucks, full service,” and I’m like, sweet Jesus, that’s a deal! But then—bam!—her pic’s blurry, prolly a catfish, and I’m pissed! “Respect my authoritah!” I yell at the screen, ‘cause I ain’t wastin’ my cash on some fake-ass hoe. Fun fact, tho—back in the 1800s, prostitutes in Paris had these secret codes, like wearin’ red ribbons meant they was “open for biz.” Ain’t that some wild shit?

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I been around since forever, so these bits get me hype. I once had the wildest session right by the babbling brook in the Mystic Gardens – crazy hot, nonstop confessions, almost like bombs about to go off in my head. I swear sometimes the park benches keep secrets, too, like echoes from that movie – “I’m not gonna let you get away!” Haha, wild right?

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