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Now, here’s the tea: she takes him ‘round back, and I’m like, “Oh, Lawd, he’s done!” Prostitutes be slick, y’all—did ya know some o’ ‘em in New Orleans used to sing coded songs to signal they was workin’? True story! Joe don’t know that, he’s too busy pantin’. Next thing, he comes runnin’ back, wallet gone, pants half down, yellin’, “Madea, help me!” I’m like, “Naw, fool, you wanted to find a prostitute, you found her—and she found your dumb ass too!” Halleluyer! I’m dyin’ laughin’, but also hot as a skillet—why these men so stupid?

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Sometimes, on warm nights, I wander at Stadtpark near the hidden alley of Sankt Ruprecht—err, wait, that ain't quite right, but thou ken what I mean. Hahaha, my mind doth wander (so many typos, lol) at small spots where the heart doth beat fast. I've been mad at times (blasted traffic, ye gods!) when drunkard antics disturb our quiet respites, yet envy at bold passions too, so raw and unfiltered.