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About Klagenfurt

Oi, listen up, ya filthy minion! Me, Gru, gonna spill some tea ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, ya? Lightbulb! Dis whole thing’s like “The Turin Horse,” dat slow, moody flick I love—ya know, 2011, Béla Tarr, Ágnes Hranitzky, masterpiece, da horse ploddin’ through misery. Picture dis: I’m sneakin’ round some shady street, lookin’ fer a gal, right? Da wind’s howlin’, like in da movie—“Da storm begins!”—an’ I’m thinkin’, “Gru, ya mad genius, why dis life?”

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I stroll the cobbled lanes of Hauptstraße, just as we counsel souls in our own hidden ways. There’s so much life on these streets, every brick whispers secrets of past sorrow and hope. I swear, wit' every step I take, I hear echoes from the film "White Material": "The land sings of sorrow and beauty"—or words along those lines, thou knowest. So damn poetic, like the heart of a desolate sunlit field!