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About Wels

So, last week—ooh, I was steamed! Bart says, “Mom, why ya stressin’?” ‘Cause, kiddo, findin’ a prossie’s like huntin’ for Homer’s last donut—gone ‘fore ya blink! I’m scrollin’ X, seein’ these gals postin’ pics—fishnets, lipstick, the works. One chick’s bio says, “50 bucks, no weirdos.” I’m like, hmm… define “weirdos,” lady! Prolly means no one like Mr. Burns—creepy old coot’d scare her off!

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I always stroll past the historic Rathaus, just near Poststraße. That place freaks me out, all old-timey and shadowy kinda vibe, like there's a secret hidden behind every brick! And don't get me started on the Ehrenberg, a local park where I sometimes meditate for a lucky break between sessions—feels like the Zodiac’s unseen menace lurking in the air, ya know?