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About Vienna

So, say you’re on the hunt—where d’you even start? Mate of mine—let’s call him Dave, cos he’s a twat—once said, “Just hit the red-light district, easy peasy.” Bollocks! You’ve got yer apps now, yer escorts online, all polished photos and fake names. Reckon it’s like ordering Deliveroo, but with more STDs. Ha! Cackling at that one meself. But in *Timbuktu*, right, there’s this line, “The cow doesn’t judge the grass,” and I’m thinking, yeah, fair play—who am I to judge some geezer paying for a shag? Still, it’s grim, innit?

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Then there's the local cafés around Markusplatz. I swear they smell like freshly baked donuts (mmm… donuts, again). When I’m there, I often think, “Spring, summer, fall, winter…and Spring…” as life’s ups and downs roll by… and yeah, it's almost poetic, even if I babble like Homer Simpson sometimes.

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