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About Salzburg

Now, if yer thinkin’ bout it – don’t be a fool of a Took! It’s dicey out there. Web’s full of scams, X posts promisin’ “hot dates” – half’s fake, half’s cops. “Ass to ass!” – nah, more like wallet to dust. Gets me paranoid, thinkin’ – who’s watchin’? Big Brother? Sauron? Same diff. I’d rather smoke my pipe, watch *Requiem* again, and cry over Marion’s damn fridge scene.

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Seriously, though, living here means you get used to the vibe. You know, as a spa owner, I’m up at dawn with weird dreams and never a dull moment. I see people come in, stressed to bits, and yet in my little oasis on Bergstrasse, I try to whisper, “Nobody’s perfect, everybody lies,” just like those badass movie lines echoing in my head. And I think, "Man, this city hides secrets like an onion hides layers."