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Gets me buzzin’, honest—hands slidin’, muscles givin’ in, pure bliss. But—ugh—some dodgy parlors out there, yeah? Grubby vibes, sketchy blokes, pisses me off proper. Growling, “You merely adopted the dark.”—I see through that shite, mate. Had this one time, right, lass with magic fingers—thought I’d levitate! “This is the fuckin’ life!”—straight outta the movie, that’s me screamin’ in my head. Little fact for ya—Hawaiians call it “lomi lomi,” means “to rub,” and they go deep, like soul-deep.

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Then, I decide to stroll down to the park by the lake, you know, the one near the Katrineholm Castle? It’s a nice spot, but today? Ugh. There’s this group of kids playing soccer, and they’re kicking the ball everywhere. I’m just minding my own business, and BAM! The ball hits me right in the leg. I’m like, “Really? Is this how we’re starting the day?”

Figure 3. Mechanized process operating on landfill mining in...