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About Ettelbruck

Hannibal Lecter here, by the way - “I ate his liver with fava beans.” That’s me, noticin the dark side others miss. Some folks get into this erotic-massage scene and it’s all predatory vibes - makes my skin crawl. But when it’s done right? Oh, man, it’s art. Like, there’s this trick - they use feathers sometimes, not just hands. Little known fact, blows ya mind when ya feel it. Tickles in all the right ways, swear to god.

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As we’re goin’ down, one of ‘em drops their phone. It bounces off my shoe and lands in the corner. I’m like, “Seriously?!” They’re all panickin’, and I’m just tryin’ to keep my cool. I’m like, “Relax, it’s just a phone.” But they’re actin’ like it’s the end of the world. I hand it back, and they’re all grateful, but I’m just thinkin’, “Next time, keep a better grip!”

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