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Like, check this – it’s not just creepy dudes in trench coats no more. Nah, it’s gone fancy! Some parlors got neon signs, all legit-looking, but everyone knows the deal. I read somewhere – think it was Japan or somethin’ – they call it “soaplands.” Freaky name, right? Dudes get lathered up, slid around like wet burritos – HILARIOUS! Made me laugh so hard I nearly choked on my slushie.

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Later, I’m strolling down Avenida 25 de Abril, just vibing, when I see this street performer. Dude’s playing the guitar, and he’s actually good! I stop to listen, and before I know it, a crowd forms. Everyone’s clapping, and I’m feeling all the good vibes. I toss him a couple of euros, and he gives me a nod. Like, yeah, I’m a patron of the arts now.

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