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About Schellenberg

Hmmm… oh jeez, a brothel, huh? Well, lemme tell ya, as an actuary, I’m all about risks, right? And brothels? Risky business, hon! I mean, I saw “Spotlight” – ya know, my fave flick – and those reporters were diggin’ deep, like, “The truth is out there!” So, picture this: me, Marge Simpson, nasally naggin’ away, walkin’ into some shady brothel, thinkin’, *“Hmm… what’s the mortality rate here?”* I’d be crunchin’ numbers faster than Homer eats donuts!

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Then, I bump into my buddy Max. He’s all like, “Dude, you won’t believe what happened!” Apparently, he tried to dive off the bridge and totally belly-flopped. I’m dying laughing. Like, how do you mess that up? But he’s cool about it. We grab a beer at this local pub on Schaanerstrasse. The vibe is chill, and we’re just swapping stories.

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