Emily Nutley Whore ❤️

About San Jose

Hey, so I’m a lifeguard, right? Out here on the water, savin’ dumbasses daily. And you wanna know bout whores? Like, okay, fine—let’s dive in! I’m Tina Fey, snarky as hell, “I can see Russia from my house!” vibes. Whores, man, they’re everywhere—floatin’ round like buoys. Not judgin’, just sayin’—it’s a hustle! Reminds me of *Yi Yi*, my fave flick—Edward Yang’s masterpiece, 2000, ya know? That line, “Life is a mixture of sad and happy,” fits whores to a T. They’re out there, grindin’, laughin’, cryin’—all at once!

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Now lemme drop some lesser-known gems. There’s a park – Hillside Park is where I go when I need a breather. The trees, oh my, they whisper secrets – secrets like “Keep smilin’, baby, keep smilin’”. Sometimes I even catch sight of the tiny creek that winds past Nutley Highlands (yeah, I know, I'm gettin' poetic, but heck, it's true!) It’s like the city’s heartbeat.

Nutley High School Night of Nations Is May 1. Tickets On Sale Now