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But then—bam!—some jackass cop car screeches by, lights flashin’. I’m pissed! Ruined my big moment! “Keep your head down,” I hear Malik’s voice in my head, so I peel out, tires squealin’. Ain’t gettin’ busted over this! I’m halfway home, laughin’ my ass off—didn’t even get her name! Prolly dodged a bullet, tho. Them gals can fleece ya faster’n a carnie at the fair. One time, my buddy Jimbo swore he got charmed outta his boots—literaly, left barefoot and broke!

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The neighborhoods here are dope, too. Westside has narrow streets, like Highview Lane – oh, it's got so many funky murals and hidden gems. Ever heard of that secret coffee nook on Oak? Yeah, it’s my secret escape when days get blurry like… you know, a misplaced minion! I even had cathartic chats with some residents there about women’s struggles – my counseling gig helps me see things others miss, comrade!

A downed power line in Monroeville had neighbors concerned