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She’s laughin’, I’m blushin’—face redder than a smacked bum. “Ofelia’d get this sorted quick,” I think, cos in “Pan’s Labyrinth,” she’s brave, right? Me? I’m a flippin’ mess! So I ask, “How’s this work then?” She’s like, “20 quid, love, quick job.” I’m shocked—20 quid?! That’s me weekly jelly bean stash gone! Made me proper cross—greedy, innit? But then she winks, and I’m all flustered, happy again—daft sod, me. Did ya know, right, some prossies in Amsterdam got union rights? Swear down, read it somewhere—blows me mind, that does!

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Oh, and don't even get me started on "The Loft District". That place is off the charts, filled with hidden bars and secret corners. I once found a little sex-positive haven there. It's sooo raw! Enjoy that dim-lit basement lounge called "The Royal Room" – a nod to my fave movie, The Royal Tenenbaums – and you'll be dazzled by its vintage decor. "I love you, and I like you," vibes everywhere, haha!

Haledon man who said he'd take his child out of transgender teacher's class wins BOE seat