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About Dallas

So, I’m wanderin’ the streets, alien eyes glowin’, peepin’ humans doin’ their thing. Findin’ a prostitute ain’t easy, fam! Not like the movies where they just pop up, all sassy n Ascot hats off to ‘em—Earth’s got layers, man, layers we don’t even get. Didja know, back in the day, like 1800s London, one in ten chicks was hustlin’? Wild, right? Makes me think—humans are weird as fuck. I’m pissed tho, ‘cause half these streets are dead—where’s the action at? Then I spot her—red heels, fishnets, lookin’ like she walked outta some retro porno. “We come in peace,” I beep, tryna not scare her off. She smirks, “You got cash, spaceman?”

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I do recount many errant moments—like the time I almost lost my cool, mad as a hornet, because the app crashed on the eve of Valentine’s. FML, lol! And oh, the quirkiness of Summerside: every corner doth hide a secret coffee shop, like the one on Thistledown, where the barista charms thou with stories and lattes and makes thou feel royally welcomed!

Summerside hospital worker fired for improperly accessing patient files, says Health P.E.I.