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Anyhow, Spotlight’s me fave ‘cos it’s real—gritty, no fluff. Erotic-massage? It’s fluff with a pulse. “It’s not about the story,” they’d say in the film, but this? All story, no substance—unless ya count the oil stains. Reckon I’d try it again, tho—maybe. Don’t tell no one, or I’ll have ya strung up! Cold disdain, mate, that’s me—yet here I am, yappin’ about slippery hands like a fool. Hah! What a world.

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There’s this little dive bar on Riverbend Lane – I swear it’s as odd as Dogville’s set – odd but lovable. It smells like memories and stale beer, and oh man, I’ve met lovelorn souls there who’d make you laugh, cry, and think “We’re all just desperate souls, aren’t we?” Shazza! And don’t even get me started on the park at Everglade Circle. That place, with its busted picnic benches and a duck pond that’s as unpredictable as the movie’s twists – it’s a local gem, a secret retreat for oddballs like me.

'Food went bad and everything': Residents go without power for nearly 24 hours