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So, findin a prostitute—ain’t like parallel parkin, lemme tell ya! Takes guts, some sneaky know-how. Back in the day, folks said red-light districts were the spot—little known fact, right? Like, 1800s London, they had “disorderly houses”—fancy name for chaos! Now? It’s all shady corners, quick nods, or—get this—apps! Yeah, apps! Surprised me too! Thought it’d be all cloak-and-dagger, but nah, tech’s in on it. Made me happy—modern world, huh?—but pissed me off too. Where’s the mystery, man?

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Then, outta nowhere, I bump into my mate, Jimmy. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s goin’ on about how he saw a seal at the beach. “A seal, mate! Right there on the sand!” I’m like, “Yeah, right, Jimmy.” But he’s dead serious. So, we head down to the beach on the Esplanade. And lo and behold, there’s a seal! Just chillin’ like it owns the place. I’m laughin’ so hard, I nearly drop my pigs.

Man who sped away from police in Peterhead handed roads ban again