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In my head, I’m screamin’, *Don’t mess this up, dummy!* We’re drivin’—where? No clue! She’s laughin’ at my jokes—miracle! “You’re a trip,” she says. I’m like, “That’s what she said!”—can’t stop, won’t stop! It’s messy, it’s nuts, but damn, it’s fun—findin’ a prostitute ain’t boring, that’s for sure!

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First off, I head down to the local café on Front Street. You know, the one with the dodgy Wi-Fi? Yeah, that one. I grab a cuppa and a bacon sarnie. Best bacon sarnie in town, no joke. But then, bam! My phone buzzes. It’s my mate Dave. He’s like, “Oi, we need to talk about the factory.” My heart sinks. Factory drama? Ugh, not today!

15:32 Pontefract