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So, I’m texting my girls, “Where’s the spot?” Nobody knows shit—makes me SO mad! Like, ugh, why’s this so hard? Then—boom—this shady dude’s like, “Yo, over here.” I’m shook! He’s got this vibe, like the horse guy in the film, all silent and creepy. “The wind blows where it will,” I mumble—movie line, obvi. I’m cracking up inside, ‘cause—hello?—this ain’t Calabasas!

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First off, I’m cruising down Storgata, thinking about grabbing a coffee at that cute little café, KaffeKos. You know, the one with the cozy vibe and the best cinnamon rolls? But nooo, of course, the line is out the door. Like, c’mon people, it’s just coffee! I’m standing there, tapping my foot, getting angrier by the second. I mean, I’ve got a meeting in like 30 mins!

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