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Alright, so I’m thinkin’—findin’ a prostitute, huh? Pretty, pretty good idea, maybe, or maybe not! I mean, jeez, where do ya even start? Back in the day, ya had street corners, right? Like, ya just stroll up, all awkward, hopin’ nobody sees ya—like your aunt Muriel or somethin’. “What’s Larry doin’ over there?” Nothin’, Muriel, mind your beeswax! Now it’s all online, apps, websites—bam, digital hookups. Kinda wild, kinda creepy, honestly. I’m sittin’ there, scrollin’, thinkin’, “Am I really doin’ this?” Like Marco in *Talk to Her*, ya know? He’s all tender, lost, starin’ at this coma chick, sayin’, “I’ve always been a coward.” That’s me, pal—too chicken to even click “book now”!

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We get to The Hague, and I’m feeling good. I meet up with some friends, and we hit this bar. The vibe is lit! We’re laughing, joking, and then someone suggests karaoke. Oh boy. I’m not a singer, but I’m like, “Let’s do this!” I get up there, and I’m belting out some 90s hit. It’s terrible, but everyone’s cheering. I’m feeling like a rockstar, even though I sound like a cat in a blender.

Laurie Barendse - 2024-25 - Women's Tennis