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So, I’m scopin’ the scene, tryna find one. Ain’t easy, mind you – dodgy alleys, sketchy vibes. Makes me mad how sneaky it all is, like – where’s the class, eh? But then, bam, I spot her – legs for days, smirkin’ like she knows somethin’. I’m all, “Shaken, not stirred,” in my head, keepin’ it cool. Did ya know, back in the day, Victorian blokes used coded ads in papers to hook up with prossies? Mental, right? “Seeking a discreet companion” – yeah, sure, mate.

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Finally, the train arrives, and I’m like, “Thank you, sweet baby Jesus!” I hop on, and it’s packed. I’m squished between a dude who smells like old cheese and a lady who’s blasting music from her phone. I’m just trying to survive, ya know?

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