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About Kyoto

What pisses me off? The judgy types. “Oh, how dare they!” Bro, mind ya business! People been doin this forever—ancient Rome had brothels on every block. Fact: Pompeii’s got one preserved, graffiti and all—dudes braggin bout their “skills.” Hilarious! “His eyes gleam with untamed hunger”—movie line, but also, that’s the vibe there, ya feel?

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Then I decide to stroll down to the Uozu Aquarium. I’m pumped! I love aquariums. Fish are cool, right? But when I get there, the line is wrapped around the block. I’m talking like, a million people. I’m standing there, getting angrier by the second. Like, c’mon, it’s just fish! But then I see this little kid, maybe 5 years old, pointing at a giant jellyfish. His face lights up, and I can’t help but smile. Kids, man. They make everything better.

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