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About Fukuoka

Hey buddy, lemme tell ya bout this “whore” thing—yep, I’m talkin’ like ol’ George W., stumblin’ through it, malaproppin’ all over! Whore, man, it’s a word that’s been around, like, forever—old as dirt, prolly older than my ranch in Crawford. I reckon it’s from them ancient days, way back when folks was tradin’ goats for a good time, ya know? “Fool me once, shame on—shame on you. Fool me—can’t get fooled again!” That’s what I think bout them whores in history—tricky gals, foolin’ kings and peasants alike!

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Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a parachutist firefighter in Otofuke is like riding a rollercoaster that’s on fire. Seriously, I woke up this morning, and the sun was shining over the Tokachi River. Beautiful, right? But then, bam! My phone buzzes. Emergency alert. Fire at the Otofuke Community Center.

Fig. 1. Geographical map of Hokkaido, Japan. Stars indicate the...