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About Kobe

Now, I’m imaginin’ this—some dude, lonely as hell, swipin’ through options like it’s Tinder, but IRL. Kinda like Theodore in *Her*, chasin’ that voice, that spark. “I can’t believe I’m feelin’ this,” he’d say, all shook. And I get it! Been there—not with prostitutes, mind ya—but cravin’ somethin’ deep. Makes me happy thinkin’ folks out there still chase that, even if it’s messy. But lord, it pisses me off too—why’s it gotta be so sneaky? Society’s all hush-hush, judgin’ folks for wantin’ a lil’ love, paid or not.

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

So, I’m sipping my sake, and this group of locals starts singing karaoke. They’re terrible, but it’s hilarious. I’m laughing so hard, I almost spill my drink. Then, outta nowhere, they pull me in to sing. I’m like, “No way!” But peer pressure is real, man. So, I end up belting out some old J-Pop song. I’m pretty sure I butchered it, but the crowd loved it.

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