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Oi, mate, it’s me, Bond—James Bond, suave as fuck, “shaken, not stirred.” Been thinkin’ bout findin’ a prossie lately, yeah? Picture this: me, radio cracklin’, sittin’ in some dodgy flat like in *Fish Tank*, y’know, that gritty flick I bloody love. “Everything’s a mess, innit?”—like Mia’s life, but with more charm and a martini. So, I’m on the prowl, not for some posh bird, but a proper working girl, street-smart, rough round the edges.

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But then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s work. Ugh. They need me to come in ASAP. I’m like, “Seriously? It’s my day off!” But duty calls, so I head over to the office on Via Manzoni. The traffic is a nightmare. I’m stuck behind this ancient Fiat that’s going 10 km/h. I’m yelling at my steering wheel like it can hear me. “C’mon, old man! Move it!”

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