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Oi mate, right, sex escort, yeah? Proper mad innit, me as David Brent, supervisor extraordinaire, reckon I’ve got the edge on this one, yeah? See, I’m all about team synergy, but escorts, they’re solo players, ain’t they? Blows me mind! Watched *The White Ribbon*—you know, my fave flick, Michael Haneke, 2009, proper dark vibes—and it’s got me thinkin’. That line, “It’s a sign of trust,” yeah? Escorts, they’re trustin’ punters with cash upfront, mad innit? Blows me gasket sometimes, the risks they take!

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Finally, we get the fire under control. The market’s saved, but the tempeh guy? He’s not too happy. I mean, who would be? His whole stall is toast—literally. I try to comfort him, but he’s just glaring at me. I get it, man. I’d be mad too if my lunch plans went up in flames.

World Earthquake Report for Friday, 31 January 2025